You know how frustrating a long and unexciting relationship can be. Plus,
there are chick waiting to be boinked. It's like mental, emotional and sexual
torture. Worst case is when the bae is still very much into you.
Follow these steps to end it without hurting her and feeling guilty. Don't rush
all the steps together though. She must believe one step before going to the
next.
Note: Only for naij girls.
1. We all saw this one coming. Tell her you are broke, ACT IT WELL (Watch
Clemson Ohameze movies for tips) and nag about it a lot. Make up
something like, you took a loan at your workplace or you made them lose a
big deal and you have to work for a "long long long" time to pay up for it.
2. Constantly ask her for little things like N100 credit, change for transport
(or ask her for fuel money), N1000 to help you eat for the week etc.
3. Let her catch you crying (figure a way), then beg her not to tell anyone.
Tell her you were crying cause you don't see things changing soon.
4. Now, tell her how your friends laugh at you and mock you. You can get
your friend to text you some humiliating strokings, then show her.
5. Start asking her if she still loves (I'm very sure she'll give you the "are you
mad?" look). Randomly call her and beg her not to break up with you.
6. Start a serious argument, I mean, a really heated argument. A very
recommended one is the "I know you're seeing someone else" argument.
7. Finally, after the argument, don't call her again. It's over, she'll not call
you again either. She'll be happy not to hear from you again. If she calls you
to make up...she's not Nigerian...and that's another ball game.
I know some of y'all will bash me but isn't it a f@#king memorable way to
break up with a girl?
YOLO!
